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Twin Souls: When it Becomes an Obsession


There is no saying why someone becomes obsessed with the twin soul and there is no rational explanation other than love. Love is this irrational, filling, thing that escapes any logical explanation. Biology can only understand a fraction of love’s effect on a person and the trips the mind goes on because of it are nothing but a breath away from insanity. This obsession can not only be born out of negativity in the relationship but also of the positivity.

The twin soul relationship is famous for its all-consuming love. This is what makes the relationship so desirable and appealing to many, but there are dark aspects to the relationship that rarely get touched upon. There are issues like mistaken identity, where a person thinks he or she has found his or her twin soul but in reality it may be a soul mate or near twin. Situations like these cause great pain, depression, loss of faith in everything, and so on. The chronic obsession many experience with this topic can sometimes be mixed with mistaken identity, making it all the more painful. Then there is simply the overwhelming desire to find one’s twin only because of having stumbled upon the topic online or elsewhere. In this case, the person is a victim of advertising, of the romantic ideals that are described, and this inevitably leads to pain.

Most of the pain people experience when it comes to twin souls is due to misunderstandings and misinformation. I say this all the time. When first learning of this type of relationship, people tend to think of it as the “perfect union.” And the “perfect union” in the minds of many is an easy relationship full of joy and bliss. This is not the twin soul relationship.

The realization that the twin soul relationship is not this union of utter happiness is what causes great pain and suffering. In turn, this realization makes many become obsessed with the twin because he or she will be desperate to “fix it.”

Becoming obsessed with this other person who seems to know everything about you, from your loftiest and holiest side, to the things you wish never existed, is natural. It is a natural and unavoidable part of the relationship. An obsession takes root because not only is it fascinating that this person can see right through you, but that you can do the same right back. This intimacy, this true intimacy is intimidating and addicting at once. With this intimacy comes the feeling of wholeness and that is what causes the obsession. The feeling that everything is right even if your situation isn’t the greatest at the moment, makes you feel safe, warm, loved, and whole. That is what gets you hooked. The love you feel for this person is addicting because it is like nothing you have ever experienced. The thought of losing this, this love and whatever this is, is what makes the obsession burn hotter. That fear of losing everything makes you a voracious lover.

Again, this is a natural stage of the relationship. It can last a few months or years. This love that comes with all these overwhelming feels and thoughts teaches the twins many lessons. But, there comes a point where it is time to move on. Not necessarily from the relationship, though that depends on the particular situation and it is impossible to say it is the same for everyone, but if you truly are in a twin soul relationship then you will both face challenges of the spiritual/intellectual kind. See, the twins grow through their love for each other. They learn many truths of life and love that are otherwise hidden and this may cause swells of positivity or negativity in the relationship. Through those cycles the union evolves. But if the twins remain obsessed with each other and neglect everything else, things begin to fall apart. This then makes the obsession even stronger. Why? Because the desperation to not lose the connection will urge the person to find a “solution.”

I feel like I am not being clear enough in explaining this to you and like I am going around in circles, circling the same idea and not really going anywhere. So, let me give you a concrete example:

There is a couple and they are at the end of their introductory stage. This means that there is beginning to be some distance between them. Twin A decides he needs to rekindle the connection. He starts doing research and trying to maintain the connection and even strengthen it. So Twin A is now obsessed with the topic and with his own twin. Nothing is as important or as interesting as his twin soul and how this relationship is supposed to work. He learns that meditation is key to connecting with his twin. So he decides he wants to connect with his twin via meditation. Twin A researches how to “connect with your twin through meditation” and he skips through until he finds what he wants. In his rush to get to his twin soul, to being able to connect with his twin, he misses the knowledge that is a prerequisite to the whole “connecting with your twin through meditation.” Twin A is missing out on the essential information and knowledge that would allow him to build that connection he so desires.

The thing to take away from this is that the twin soul relationship is not just about connecting with your twin. This relationship is not just about being in a relationship with this other person. It is not just about you and your partner feeling good, being good, and having the good life. The twin soul relationship is about learning about the soul, hence the name twin soul. This relationship is about learning about mediation not only to connect with your other half, but also to connect with the world and universe.

This obsession that many experience, that all twins experience, can be a never ending pit of longing and suffering. If you are in a twin soul relationship and all of your spiritual knowledge is purely about twin souls, then most likely you are separated from your twin, you are having difficulties with your twin, or you have not met your twin at all. This is because the twin soul obsession causes disharmony within yourself. You are no longer true to yourself. You are searching for something that isn’t lost. When you are disharmonious, separation ensues. Separation is the way the universe tries to help you learn because if you are with your twin you will feel no need to fix those issues within or to explore beyond the bounds of your relationship.

The question then becomes, “How do I fix it?” How do I find harmony within? The biggest part of this is intention. Your intention is what will cause different results. For example, if your intention to find inner harmony is purely so that you can reunite with your twin, you will not find harmony and you will not have a reunion. If your intention is to find harmony for the sake of harmony, then you will find it and everything else will begin to open up. The thing is not to fix it but to learn. Sometimes these lessons take time and no matter what you do, the results may not be what you wish. Intention, awareness, and soul are the best guides.

Namaste.

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