top of page

Melissa Portan LMSW, MEd

Writer & Sexologist

Melissa is a 5th generation spiritual guide who specializes in helping others find their own spiritual path. She is also a sex and relationship therapist practicing in NYC.


  • Pinterest - Grey Circle
  • Facebook - Grey Circle
  • Twitter - Grey Circle
  • YouTube - Grey Circle
  • Instagram - Grey Circle
  • Writer's pictureM

What does it feel like when you’re with your soul-mate?


“Sprout” by Hana Jang

It’s a funny thing, finding a soul-mate. There are many soul-mates, different kinds/types of soul-mates, and we all have soul-mates. But there is always that one special soul-mate, that one person that you can spend the rest of your life with. The romantic soul-mate is the one relationship that can last a lifetime. Out of all the connections you can make with other soul-mates, with lovers, friends, and family, the romantic soul-mate is the one you feel closest to.

Considering that love is this intangible thing and that the idea of a soul-mate implies the belief of a soul; thereby, reincarnation, the romantic soul-mate comes across as a very familiar person. A feeling of having already met this person is overwhelming. There is excitement in your belly and you laugh easily at his or her jokes. Often, you say the same things at the same time, or one says what the other was thinking. These types of soul-mates have this affinity to each other because they have already met before. The reason there is such familiarity and such passion in a soul-mate relationship is because there is that familiar spark, that familiar energy, and a love that has been around for long time.

The romantic soul-mate is the one you feel closest to, the one you feel most connected to, the one you know that you already know. How does this connection come about? You might notice a staggering amount of coincidences. You both hangout at the same café often, you both like the same music, constantly running into each other, and so on. So, basically, you have a lot in common. Although you have a lot in common, there will inevitably be disagreements and differences. Differences in religion and politics are common and often threatening to a soul-mate relationship, regardless if it is a romantic soul-mate or amiable soul-mate. But because this is the soul-mate, differences are overcome, either quickly or gradually, depending on the couple. Romantic soul-mates, when they are very close to each other, will want to work over whatever difficulties. There is a persistence to this kind of love, even if it does wane every now and then, and deep commitment to each other.

So, what does it feel like? Establishing the connection or relationship feels easy. The best way to describe this relationship is to say that it comes naturally. There is an ease or flowing to the relationship that other soul-mate relationships do not match. It is exciting and new, yet familiar at the same time, and people comment on how good you two look together, and a feeling everything being right and good shines over everything else. You come to the realization that you are not alone, that you have a partner even if he or she is not perfect, but it is someone that can and will be there for you.

Love, in all types of relationships, with or without a spiritual touch, requires work and commitment. The romantic soul-mate understands this and there begins to be harmony between the couple. How do you find this soul-mate? You cannot look at someone and just say, “that is the one.” Some might say that you can, but it is more of an internal thing; meaning that you feel something that is inexplicable and you will just know. This romantic soul-mate will be attracted to you, it will be a mutual joining and attraction, and it will just happen.




Recent Posts

See All


Healing: A Journey Through Time

Wounds. Time heals all wounds. That is one of the biggest lies people tell to assuage the pain they are feeling in the present. The truth is, time is indifferent to your pain and suffering. Time does

bottom of page